Large, Soft Stool.

Birchington's secret gay club, The Minnis, was the place to be, last night!
With their funky lighting (I still can't see properly, even now) and funky band, you could say I was feeling properly funked up at the end of the evening!
But the créme de la créme has to be their seating. Great big, comfortable leather chairs and stools.
I was in arse heaven!
Which was just what the doctor ordered, after the pounding that my poor old pooper has recieved of late.
Speaking of doctors, Samuel had some good hints and tips and advised me that I should use liberal amounts of calamine lotion (to help relieve the chaffing) and lighter petrol (to shrink things back into shape).
Guess I won't be lighting my farts for a while!
And to top it all, bless his sweet heart, he said there wouldn't be any charge for my consultation as he was happy just to have the chance to keep his hand in!