Having had one or two problems, of late, with my 'raison d'être', I decided to call upon the wisdom of my online Birchington chum, Dr 'Samuel' (proctologist extraordinaire), to see if he could help.
After a swift, but delicate, examination, he opined that my problem may stem from a combination of Thanet life and a diet far too rich in lentils and chick-peas, recommending that I ease up on both (but not until he'd left, of course!).
I can't honestly say that I'm too happy about that but if it's going to save all the embarrassment (and mess) that I've been experiencing recently, well, hey-ho, I'll give it a go.
He's such a good man, the Doc, and a wonderful lover (if a bit brutal at times) that it really does escape me as to why he has so few friends!
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3 comments:
Maybe eat more stodge (chick peas and lentils are for hippies)and look for guys with smaller dicks?
How peculiar that hole food should have given you such trouble.
I think the problem lies in not chewing my food properly. One answer, perhaps, would be to liquidise everything before I eat/drink it.
Actually, scrub that. Liquid lunches are on my 'things to dispense with' list for this year!
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